Damian & Katerina = How To [vil-helm] #103

Hello our Vilhelmians! Alyce had a busy week, with a big hike, ice skating, and meetings with mom, and dad had his first 48 hours solo with her. Meanwhile, Damian reflected on 2024, noting growth, parenting adventures, and a newfound appreciation for peace over happiness, including his ADHD diagnosis and screen time challenges. The dogs, Boujee and Dapper, shared their magical experience ice skating at the Royal Botanical Gardens, enjoying the winter wonderland and their new family adventures with a year-round pass.

Tiny Tales from Alyce's Weekly Wonders

Hi everyone, it’s me, Alyce! I had such a busy and exciting week, I just have to tell you all about it. It all started last Sunday, when Mom and Dad decided to take the family out for a little walk. Well, you know what they say, "A little walk never stays little for long!" It turned into a big ol' hike, and before we knew it, we were walking on ice! Yes, ice! We made it to the other side of Coote's Paradise, where the lake was frozen, and I got to cruise in my cozy stroller while Boujee and Dapper skated all around. It was so magical. The sun was setting, the sky turned all pretty and pink, and deer were strolling through the forest like they were in a fairy tale. It was such an adventure!

But wait—there's more! The week just kept spiraling with even more fun. I got to go with Mom to some of her meetings because she’s been busy at work. I’m very good at sitting quietly and listening to people talk about grown-up things, but honestly, I was mostly looking forward to the next adventure! And speaking of adventures, I spent 48 hours with just my dad and the dogs because my mom had to go to Toronto for work and stay overnight. This was my dad's first time all alone with me and the dogs, and let me tell you, we had SO much fun! I missed my mom, but she called me on FaceTime a couple of times a day, so I didn’t feel too lonely. Plus, my dada made sure I was well-fed, changed, and entertained. It was a lot, but he did such a good job—I think he deserves a medal! And guess what? TayTay was there too during the day, which was so comforting and made everything feel just right. I really love my nanny!

Finally, on Thursday evening, Mom came home! It felt like she never left.

Phew! What a week. Now I’m ready for some more adventures and I can’t wait for what’s next!

Big hugs and bisous,
Alyce 💖

The Secret to Inner Peace (Even When the World is Falling Apart)

Ever feel like you're juggling a million things, and just trying to keep all the balls in the air? That's been my life lately, especially navigating the wild world of toddlerhood and the increasingly complex geopolitical landscape. But amidst the chaos, 2024 was a year of incredible growth, and I'm excited to reflect on it, and look ahead to 2025.

Our biggest, most amazing accomplishment? We somehow managed to transform a tiny, squishy newborn into a full-fledged toddler! Parenting has been the ultimate adventure, full of laughter, tears, and a whole lot of improvisation. While Kat and I definitely have our disagreements (like all couples), raising Alyce apart has never even been a thought. Parenting is hard. Last week, I had Alyce solo for 48 hours, and let's just say I developed a newfound appreciation for Kat's constant presence. Don't get me wrong, I managed, but why would I want to do that all the time?!

Kat and I are a united front against the formidable force that is our daughter, Alyce. Our parenting strategy? Mostly improvised, equal parts teamwork and hilarious chaos. Then there's bedtime. Kat's the "gentle giant" – soothing songs and whispered stories. Me? Tuck, run, and lock the door! Just kidding (mostly). I’m a master of distraction with an arsenal of silly voices and tickles. Alyce usually falls asleep before we even decide who's the better parent. The real victory is the shared exhaustion, a bonding experience unique to co-parenting. We've also mastered the art of the "tag-team toddler." One of us entertains while the other attempts (often unsuccessfully) to accomplish adult tasks like showering or eating a meal that's not lukewarm. It's a constant, hilarious game of give and take, filled with witty banter, tired sighs, and the shared satisfaction of surviving another day.

Our little girl is a perfect blend of both sets of grandparents and us. Sometimes, when she looks at me with a certain glint in her eye, I know exactly what she's thinking…which means she thinks like me. We are so screwed!

Speaking of challenges, one major one we're facing is screen time. It's like a highly addictive drug. Sometimes, getting just 15 minutes of peace means giving in. Anyone else relate? Ah, screen time. That digital babysitter we both love and hate. My strategy? A mixture of distraction, strategic bargaining, and occasionally, surrendering to the siren call of Peppa Pig. The guilt? Oh, it's a constant companion. But hey, at least we’re all (mostly) calm.

On a completely different note, 2024 also brought a significant personal discovery: I have ADHD. This piece of information has put so many things into perspective. Diagnosed in my 40s, which, in my defense, is still practically a toddler in adult years. The revelation wasn't a dramatic "aha!" moment, more like a slow-dawning realization that, "Oh, that's why..." My ADHD diagnosis explained so much – the constant distractions, the difficulty focusing. It's like my brain is a hyperactive squirrel, always chasing the next shiny thing. But now, I'm learning to channel that energy, especially as it relates to finding more peace in my life.

Finally, and most importantly, the biggest takeaway from 2024 for me has been the shift from chasing happiness to finding peace. This feels especially relevant amidst the current geopolitical landscape, where news cycles are dominated by uncertainty and often, anxiety-inducing events. For so long, I think I equated success, or even just a good day, with feeling happy. Like happiness was this destination I needed to constantly strive for, a feeling I had to manufacture. And honestly? It's exhausting. It's like running on a treadmill, always striving for something just out of reach. There's a constant pressure to be joyful, and when you inevitably fall short, there's that pang of disappointment.

This year, though, I've started to realize that happiness isn't a constant state of being. It's fleeting, like sunshine on a cloudy day. It comes and goes, and that's okay. What I've begun to prioritize instead is peace. It's a deeper, more grounded feeling. It's not about ecstatic highs, but about a sense of contentment, acceptance, and resilience. It's about finding calm amidst the chaos – be it the chaos of parenting, or the broader anxieties stemming from the world around us – appreciating the small moments, and being okay with the full spectrum of emotions, even the uncomfortable ones.

Finding peace isn't passive. It takes work, too. For me, finding peace has meant incorporating daily mindfulness practices, like short meditations and mindful walks. Even just five minutes of quiet reflection in the morning can make a difference. I've also started a gratitude journal, where I write down three things I'm grateful for each day. It helps me focus on the positive, even when things are tough. And perhaps most importantly, I'm actively working on letting go of the things I can't control, which is a constant challenge as a parent and a citizen of the world. It's about accepting that life is messy and imperfect, and finding joy and meaning within that messiness. It's not about ignoring the challenges or pretending they don't exist, but about navigating them with a sense of inner calm. So, instead of chasing that elusive high of happiness, I'm focusing on cultivating a sense of peace, a quiet strength that allows me to weather the storms and appreciate the sunshine when it appears. It's a work in progress, of course, but it feels much more sustainable, and ultimately, much more fulfilling.

One thing's for certain: life will always throw curveballs, and the next four years are 100% guaranteed to have a bunch of them on the world stage. In these uncertain times, let's ensure we're looking out for one another. What are some of your favorite ways to find peace amidst the chaos? Share your tips in the comments below!

Woof Woof! 🐾

Well, mon dieu, things have definitely taken a turn since our dad got the family a year-round pass for the Royal Botanical Gardens in Hamilton. Now, it’s not the usual routine of lounging by the window or sunbathing under the sofa for us anymore—no, no, no! We’re off to this park, that park, and who knows where else because, apparently, he’s determined to get the full value out of that membership. C'est la vie, we suppose. But you know what? Last week was something truly magical.

Imagine this: a sunset that looked like it came straight out of a French impressionist painting, filled with snow, LOTS of snow. It was like the whole world was covered in a fluffy white blanket. The beauty of nature was at its finest, and we had the most magnifique view, stretching all the way to Cootes Paradise (yes, we know it sounds fancy, but that’s what it’s called)!

But then... the real magic happened. We walked—no, scratch that—we skated on to ice! Can you believe it? Boujee and I, your favorite French bulldogs, skating on a frozen lake! It was like we were starring in our own French movie, a winter masterpiece with us as the elegant leads, gliding effortlessly across the ice. Okay, okay, maybe not effortlessly, but we did our best. We did admire some humans playing hockey from afar, trying not to look like we were panicking at the thought of falling through the ice. Très frightening! But the sheer beauty of it all... C'est incroyable! We couldn’t help but feel like we were part of something special.

As the sun dipped lower and the light started to fade, we did get a little nervous. I mean, we’re brave French bulldogs, but when the light’s gone and the ice is glistening in a somewhat sinister way, you have to start wondering if it’s time to head back to the safety of the warmth. Still, mon dieu, it was French Bulldog weather in full effect—cold enough to be truly majestic but not so cold that we couldn’t handle a little adventure.

So, there you have it—our magical skating moment at the Royal Botanical Gardens. Who knew that a simple membership could lead to such winter wonderland moments? Now, if only we could find a way to make the dad slow down a little. All this going here and going there… we're starting to think we're part of some pawdacious travel program. But as long as there’s snow, skating, and beauty to be found, we suppose we can handle a little extra adventure.

Until next time, bisous from us,
Boujee and Dapper, your French bulldogs living life like ice skaters in the snow!